inonebasket | (no subject)

That is not the answer Dean expected and also exactly the answer Dean expected. He cracks up, slapping his knee with his hand (and immediately regretting it). Even the pain shooting up his abused arm can't stop him from grinning.

"So how you feel about taking a dump, then?"

"I dislike that as well." Cas must really dislike it, because he keeps complaining about it. "I don't understand why Father would create humans to be works of art and then include that in the plans. I can't tell if He intended it to be satirical or metaphorical, but either way-" He's edging on blasphemy with that next part, but who cares?! He can say whatever he wants! Human! Free will!

Realizing this seems to empower Cas, and he sits up straight and grips the steering wheel before saying firmly, "It's stupid."

This is the most entertained Dean's been in a long time.

"It's input-output, Cas. Body takes what it needs from food and gets rid of the rest. You hate peeing, too?"

"He could have easily designed another method." Easily. Don't give Cas your 'that's just how life is' spiel Dean, he doesn't want to hear it.

"Ah, c'mon. It's not that bad. Think of it like...a chance for peace and quiet." This might be better if he'd stop grinning. "Lot of people like to get some reading done while they're in the crapper. Catch up on the news, practice a joke. I hear some people even pray."

Dean did, once, when he was fourteen and had food poisoning and had been sure he was going to die. He'd sworn off jacking off for a month if god would just spare his life.

God did, but Dean hadn't kept up his end of the bargain.

"No."

Not even an explanation or a well thought-out argument. Just 'no.' No, and fuck you for the suggestion. Cas is going to rush bathroom time forever because all of it is gross.

"Okay, okay, fine. You're not a fan of normal, healthy, human bodily functions. At least I don't need to know your opinion on sex--unless that's changed between that brothel I took you to and now."

Seriously. Entertained.

COUGH.

"...no. Nothing's changed."

Man, suddenly Dean's week is looking up. He'd forgotten how good it felt to screw with Cas.

"We should go again, you and me. Different one this time, of course."

"I think that would be very unwise." Pay no attention to how tightly Cas is gripping the steering wheel, Dean.

Don't worry, Cas, he won't.

"Come on. We find ourselves a coupla girls, you don't tell yours about her missing daddy, we have a good time."

"We have more important matters to which we must attend." Very stiff dialogue here, Dean. Take a hint.

All of Cas' dialogue is stiff dialogue. "Yeah, right, I know. Lay low, avoid Leviathans. I mean after we're off their radar. You could do with some loosening up. You lost the tie, yeah, but you are still buttoned the hell up."

"I don't want to." There, maybe being that blunt will work.

"Cas." Dean gets a little more serious. "Look, I dunno how it is for angels, but us humans? We gotta take breaks sometimes. You stay that tense for too long and bad things start happening to you."

"I doubt I'll physically injure myself due to lack of sexual intercourse."

Oh for--

Dean rubs a hand over his face.

"It doesn't have to be sex, Cas. It can be...food or sleep or six uninterrupted hours with a textbook if you're a freak like Sammy. But I've been watching you. You don't unwind. Well, no, there's your whole remembering the stars bullcrap, but man you're almost as tense when you come back down as when you go up."

Castiel mulls that over for a while, considers avoiding the question but if experience with the Winchesters has taught him anything it's that Dean almost never lets things go. ...scratch the 'almost,' he never lets things go. Cas will eventually have to answer and he'll have to do it honestly, since he promised to himself never to lie to Dean again.

"This body is borrowed. When the Leviathan are either killed or returned to Purgatory, I plan to find Jimmy's soul and return this to him."

Edited 2011-11-22 07:25 (UTC)

Damned if that doesn't make Dean feel uncomfortable. He's so used to looking at that body and seeing Cas...he actually doesn't want it to belong to Jimmy again, not if he's being honest. Which makes him feel like a terrible human being. Which he is, so that's nothing new.

Dean ignores that. "What's that have to do with you learning how to relax? You think Jimmy's gonna be happy if you give him back a body on the verge of a heart attack because it's last inhabitant didn't know how to take a freaking nap sometimes?"

"I don't want to get too comfortable in it." He's already too comfortable with Dean; he's not entirely sure where he'll find the strength to let go, but Cas thinks it'll be easier if he can see Jimmy's soul in front of him.

"And what if Jimmy's gone? Or hey, maybe he's happy up in his heaven and doesn't wanna come back. You think about that?" Dean crosses his arms again, ignoring the twinges. "How you think it's gonna make me feel if your stoic ass keels over in the middle of a hunt, huh? That'd be pretty damn inconvenient."

Man, Dean must really want Cas to have sex. "...I'll try to find something that helps me to relax."

For you.

No, he--ARGH.

"Good."

Try to sound like less of a sulky child, Dean. Try.

Time to make Dean uncomfortable. "Ever since we've begun to share a bed, I've been managing to sleep through the night." That's relaxing, right? That counts?

"Dude!"

That is up there on the list of things Dean didn't need to know.

"Why?"